Thanks for writing and offering a different story with a happier outcome. I am glad things in your situation worked out well for you both.

I wish I could find the right words to get her to agree to meet. She’s 8,000 miles away, has a boyfriend/partner and this trip to her area may be the last opportunity I will have. I tend to write messages that are too long. How can I be short yet compelling? What’s in it for her?

I’ve thought of humor as maybe a way. Toyed with a fake magazine cover with her photo. I have no desire to dredge up the past. She was in love with my potential but I proved to be a huge disappointment. I’ve gotten better over the years. But I still make bad decisions at times.

She went no contact when she sent me the e-mail announcing the separation was permanent. She has never once broken that rule. So I gave up trying to contact her years ago and just let her be.

I have her address. She did not give it to me. I would send a FedEx. Even that may not elicit a response. Even a negative response would be better than emptiness. On some level, I believe I could be on my deathbed and if my last dying wish was to see her before I pass, she would not be moved.

The last time I saw her, she told me I should be happy because she was going to stay friends, something she had never done with any ex. Something or someone changed her mind.

So the breakup e-mail and demands for no contact came as a bit of a shock. I was accepting that our life together was over, but never dreamed the door to staying connected would be slammed shut in my face.

Her view of me, my emotions and feelings was far from realistic. She went so far as to send a letter to my daughter full of wild untrue accusations. My daughter was disgusted and angry that my ex brought her into our situation. She refused to forward the letter to me. She grudgingly read it to me over the phone a few times before deleting it.

I still remain undecided . . .