Such a beautiful share. It so reminded me of my years in the Orgasmic Meditation community.
The practice itself was life altering. Orgasmic Meditation is a female-centered sexuality practice of a woman having her clitoris stroked for 15 minutes. In a precise methodology that remains consistent in execution.
The person doing the stroking remains clothed. The strokee only removes her pants. The practice is goal less. The stroker is just there to provide pleasure not to elicit a climax.
That is not to say that climaxes by the strokee never happened. They did. But only if the strokee desired that to happen and adjusted the stroke by request to allow herself to go there. Or not to.
The stroker had no agenda, usually was not the lover of the strokee. They might be nothing more than acquaintances who agreed to follow an established protocol designed to ensure a safe environment for the woman to truly feel all there was to feel at the one point of contact.
There was no expectation of any reciprocation by the woman. No need to seek approval or do anything at all but feel into her desire in that moment.
Other than a shared observation of a feeling that arose during one moment of the 15 minutes, there was no conversation, no compliments, no asking for a date or anything at all. No thank-yous were ever exchanged. Strokers stroked for their own pleasure.
But while it was sexual, it wasn’t sex. But there was intimacy and deep feelings. Both practitioners were totally in the moment, connected by a finger tip on a clit..
The practice was usually done in a large room with multiple couples engaged. The lights were on. No candles or incense. There was a time keeper and some coaches were there to observe and offer guidance if requested. Otherwise no observers.
What happened to you emotionally happened very often to women while being stroked. For many women this was the first time in their lives where they only needed to receive, and they were in total control.
In addition to vocalizations of true pleasure, it was not unusual for a woman to start sobbing in the middle of a session. Tears flowed freely and a coach would put a box of tissues where the woman could reach it if she desired.
In my hundreds of OM sessions the feelings would range from one end of the spectrum to the other. From “is it over yet?” to total transcendence.
And a few times, I too was overwhelmed by emotion and started crying and sobbing myself.
No one judged anyone. All different ages and body types. So, participants ran straight into their own preferences and aversions.
The organization fell apart because a few people at the top turned it into a business with expensive retreats and training sessions. That of course led to a social hierarchy and sales agents on commission. The organization caused a lot of harm to participants, especially those who were sufferers of childhood trauma. But the practice itself was pure.
The practice persists around the world today, usually organized by the participants themselves with no money, sales people or profit motive. So, OM groups can be hard to find.
The lessons I learned were profound but that is for another article.
But thank you for sharing your story with readers. I think sex is a challenge for both genders, and we are still apparently uncomfortable discussing it even in long-term relationships.