I agree with you except you neglect to deal with genetics.

Guys lucky enough to be born with the “right” genes for the society in which they live will find that “spark” more often than less attractive men.

Hundreds of years ago, fat or corpulent people were considered the most attractive because their body indicated they had enough food to eat when most of the population was going hungry more often then not. Today tall and thin is in.

Due to historic gender roles, in the past women needed a man to “provide and protect”. If a man wasn’t a good hunter and fighter, he was often unattractive to women. The artist, the poet, the short or weak had a much more difficult time finding mates. The Court Jester doesn’t get the girl in the end. Life is not a movie with a Hollywood ending.

It is God’s gift to men that physical beauty isn’t nearly as important to women as it is to men.

There have been studies of “attractiveness” and having a symmetrical face is more attractive than a non-symmetrical face. Genetics matter!

These things are indeed out of our control. All we can do is make the best of the gifts we were given. Attraction is almost wired into our brains. It is the animal part of us.

We are primarily here to propagate the species. So women subconsciously seek a partner that will produce offspring with a better chance of surviving to adulthood.

Here’s the part you leave out; “good looking” people (by whatever the current operative standard) will get rejected a lot less than “ugly” people. Otherwise Cinderella would look like the wicked witch and vice versa.

And intuitively we know this and that is why rejection can be hard to deal with if the rejection is frequent. What is your advice for the frequently rejected? Don’t try to date “out of your league?”

A guy who only gets rejected 30% of the time knows from experience that “the bus runs every ten minutes”. Another attractive woman will be along shortly where there will be mutual attraction. Every guy has a friend who is “good” with women.

But what about the guy who isn’t a 7,8,9 or 10? The person who is shorter than average? Maybe they get rejected 95% of the time until they encounter a woman who sees their “inner” beauty.

Which requires more time than the initial 30 seconds after meeting a man in which a woman typically decides if she will EVER have sex with that man. Like attracts like.

Learn to love the “Friend Zone” because women have friends. Just don’t let her fix you up on a blind date unless she really knows your “type”.

Don’t hope that she will suddenly wake up and realize she is in love with you. It can happen but don’t count on it.

And don’t be a friend in name only that she uses only for those times she is down and needs a shoulder to cry on or someone to do chores and run her errands.